In the Margin

Stephanie Stolte

"To be in the margin is to be part of the whole but outside the main body. As black Americans living in a small Kentucky town, the railroad tracks were a daily reminder of our marginality ... Living as we did - on the edge - we developed a particular way of seeing reality. We looked both from the outside in and the inside out. We focused our attention on the center as well as on the margin. We understood both. This mode of seeing reminded us of the existence of a whole universe, a main body made up of both margin and center. Our survival depended on an ongoing public awareness of the separation between margin and center and an ongoing private acknowledgement that we were a necessary, vital part of that whole."

These words, written by Bell Hooks in the preface to her book, Feminist Theory - From Margin to Center, resonate with me because I, too, grew up in the margin of society. As a small child, I became aware that my sexual orientation placed me in the margin. As I grew to adulthood, I received frequent reminders of my place in society. Rarely, did anyone ask me who I knew myself to be. Instead, total strangers and sometimes friends and family, told me who I was based on a dehumanizing system of oppression that felt, to them, as natural as the air we breathe. This tendency to see me as 'other' continues all too frequently today, even among friends and family. It is a daily challenge for minorities to negotiate the systemic oppression prevalent in our society. We must see it "from the outside in and the inside out" in order to survive. Unfortunately, those who benefit from a system of oppression are encouraged to only see it from the inside, to become anesthetized and blind to their own privilege.

I am here today to ask us all to wake up and allow the scales to fall from our eyes, so that we can overcome the dull inertia of the status quo and begin to dismantle our culture of oppression. Though I exist in the margin of society due to my sexual orientation, I simultaneously exist in the center of society due to white privilege. White privilege is given to me whether I ask for it or not, whether I deserve it or not, whether I want it or not. I do not have the option to reject it, but I do have the option to deny it, to excuse it, to let it be. White privilege gives me the option to turn my attention inward toward the center and turn my back to the margin. Tempting, isn't it? As natural as the air we breathe.

My life experience simply will not allow me to rest in the soothing embrace of white privilege. I have seen too much of its destructive, dehumanizing affect on those who live in the margin. My mother grew up in a small town in South Dakota. The local store displayed a sign on the wall, "No dogs, no Indians." My grandmother, in an attempt to protect her child by denying her mixed-race heritage, washed my mother with bleach when her skin became `too dark' in the summertime. I grew up in a large city in Minnesota. When Native Americans asserted their treaty rights to hunt and fish in a traditional way, bumper stickers appeared that said, "Save a fish, spear an Indian." As an adult living in Minnesota, I witnessed the regular dehumanizing treatment of my friend and former business partner Greg, who is visibly Native American. I saw the clench of his jaw when he was mocked with nicknames like `chief'. We were followed around town by cops and refused service in a restaurant well into the 1990's.

For all of the gains made by the Civil Rights Movement, the systemic oppression of people of color remains intact today. It weaves its way through our popular culture, educational system, economic system, legal system and yes, through our religion. In his famous essay, Letter from Birmingham Jail, Rev. Dr. King expressed his frustration with the religious people of his day who chose to sit on the sidelines of history:

"First I must confess that over the last few years I have become gravely disappointed with the white moderate. I have almost reached the regrettable conclusion that the negro's great stumbling block in the stride toward freedom is not the White Citizen's Councilor or the Ku Klux Klanner, but the white moderate who is more devoted to "order" than to justice; who prefers a negative peace which is the absence of tension to a positive peace which is the presence of justice; who constantly says, "I agree with you in the goal you seek, but I can't agree with your methods of direct action"; who paternalistically feels that he can set the timetable for another man's freedom; who lives by the myth of time and who constantly advises the Negro to wait until a "more convenient season". Shallow understanding from people of good will is more frustrating than absolute misunderstanding from people of ill will. Lukewarm acceptance is much more bewildering than outright rejection."

In 1997, the General Assembly made a commitment to move toward becoming an anti-racist, anti-oppressive, multicultural Unitarian Universalist Association of Congregations. I am here today to declare my commitment to making that vision a reality at our fellowship. As Unitarian Universalists, our principles ask nothing less of us. The time to wake from our long cultural slumber is now. The time to act is now. I ask that you join me in this commitment by examining your relationship to white privilege and by opening yourself up to the wisdom of those who live in the margin. Though it may feel uncomfortable at times, there is much to learn, much to gain. Let us all cultivate within ourselves, the ability to see both from the inside out and the outside in. By coming into right relationship with ourselves, each other and society, we can become powerful beacons of justice and make manifest Rev. Dr. King's dream of the beloved community.

Amen and Blessed Be

[Delivered May 25, 2008. Stephanie Stolte is a member of the Unitarian Universalist Fellowship of Stanislaus County. She is the Communities of Faith Outreach Director for Marriage Equality USA, a member of the Marriage Equality Leadership Team for the UU Legislative Ministry of California, a facilitator in the Covenant Circle program at UUFSC and a Certified Rolfer in private practice.]

[Ed. note: This is Pulpit Editorial. It is shorter than a regular sermon. Ms. Stolte gave it the morning we began "A Sacred Conversation on Race", a campaign by UUA President Bill Sinkford. We also listened to Which Side Are You On? by Rev. Melanie Morel-Ensminger.]

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